Let me start by saying this: I was not Ms. High School (or was I?!). I wasn't class president (we had a student council), I wasn't on student council (but my closest friends were), I definitely wasn't obsessed with high school (though honestly I did enjoy it, at least my friends and sports). So I don't think I really should've been the one to plan this. But... all my friends who were on student council are 1- living elsewhere, 2- mommies or soon-to-pop-mommies, and 3- way too busy. So in February, an old classmate from my xc team Lindsay asked if I knew anything about the reunion. I said nothing at all and I heard the Class of '99 had a terrible time planning their reunion because nobody would pay. She suggested that we co-plan.
I figured:
1- technically I do work in the event planning industry (though this event planning is what my clients do)
2- it could be interesting to try to pull off and maybe would look good on a resume since it's in the same field as my job ("and I also planned a reunion")
3- I live in town with a job that allows me the flexibility to, say, schedule a break to go look at a venue during the day
What ended up happening, in short, was:
1- Lindsay looked into one option that I thought was too expensive and she picked June 12th, which happened to be the graduation date for all h.s.s and colleges in the whole state (and way earlier than I would've picked it), and then I barely heard from her
2- I toured a few different venues, and without a committee, which apparently most reunions have (?), tried to guess what people would be interested in doing
3- I built a website which turned out pretty awesome: http://sites.google.com/site/bsh2000reunion/ Part of the fun was figuring this out because I'd never really built a site before. Google Sites actually makes it easy. Spent a good solid weekend figuring it out though. Originally it had a survey to try to figure out what people were interested in doing. The consensus was "just talking." I decided on a casual, on-your-own-$ Friday night barhop for those in town, a Saturday evening nicer event, and a casual family-friendly Sunday picnic.
4- I decided on a venue (no thanks to Lindsay not getting back to me with her input) and thought that the $45/person, while not cheap, was a decent price for a nice Saturday night event that would've included dinner and 1 drink (hey the food/bev minimum was $3000-5000 depending on which ballroom I wanted). Our graduating class had 400 people. How many was I expecting? I had no clue. I figured somewhere between the 50 people who initially said Yes on Facebook and 150/200, cause people might bring spouses. Oh and the $45 was pretty much everything at cost and only accounted for like $1-2/person toward signage. There really was no extra extravagance (no band, was just going to do an iPod hooked to the sound system, cheapest dinner option).
5- I went to the bank and opened an account just for this, which ended up being a lot of paperwork and more irritating than I expected (plus I had to put in $100 of my own money to start it)
6- I setup a PayPal account and after a lot of trouble, figured out how to put PayPal on my site so people could pay online
7- I sent out email blasts. I tried to get an ad put in the newspaper but it apparently didn't run until I'd asked them three times. I tried to get the word out by talking to whomever I ran into. I considering sending postcards (I had a list of mailing addresses that they gave us during our graduation, why had I kept this for 10yrs is beyond me, maybe I knew I'd be doing this) but it was the parents' addresses which 1- they could've moved, 2- half the people I'd already found on FB, and 3- frankly I didn't want to spend about $50 for supplies and postage of my own money upfront that I didn't think I'd get back.
8- no one paid and I started to stress out. Sent more emails. No one paid. Venue kept emailing to see how it was going and if I was going to come sign the contract, which since we weren't using an event planner (since that was me, but ya know, a real event planning business that can cover losses), I would be PERSONALLY liable for the deposit, whether or not I could collect it. Not a chance in hell of me signing that without $3000 in my account.
9- No one paid. Sent more emails. Lindsay won't return my emails. Started looking into other options and they are either 1- too expensive or 2- booked because it's now too close to the event or there are other things happening that night.
10- Get advice from other people about 1- advertising for an event that only one person eventually paid for, 2- venues that would cost just as much or more than what I'd found, and these people ALSO hadn't paid themselves. Got offers from people to help if I needed it. No, I don't need help, I need you to PAY. Oh and my favorite "I don't think my wife and I can go to the Saturday event. Are you planning anything for families like a pizza party on Saturday instead?" Umm, no, first of all I have a Sunday picnic, secondly I don't even have kids so it's not really my priority to plan that, thirdly it's not like I'm being paid for this or helped or paid to try to accommodate everyone. It was just really frustrating for me. I ended up emailing back that guy "not really except the Sunday picnic but if you want to put together a pizza party, I'll be happy to let everyone know about it."
11- Last ditch effort, find another venue that could do things for about $25/person. It's a BBQ catering place that makes it sound like it'd be so awesome to do it at their catering store. They have an outdoor area, could provide tables/seating, all plasticware... So I change things, announce it, finally drive by it and it's just awful, it's a big parking lot with a tiny grass area right on a busy intersection.
12- Get complaints from a few people about the new venue with suggestions like "hey couldn't you have them cater it but do it at such-and-such park?" Well sure, for more money, and if that park hadn't already been booked, and if YOU actually paid!
13- Send an email out that says we need to either 1- have people start paying (a few more did), 2- move the date later in the summer, or 3- just all meet up at a bar. Most people voted for #3. So, fine.
14- Run into a guy from h.s. out who says he's looking forward to the Friday pub-crawl we'd talked about doing. I said, well the Sat event is probably also just going to be at one of the breweries now, but why don't you plan Friday night since you claim you'd be willing to help. He did, decided we should meet at this chill bar Velvet downtown at 6:30pm (which I thought was way too early for a bar-hop) then he didn't show til almost 8pm.
15- Email a newer brewery 10 Barrel that has a pretty cool firepit/outdoor seating area to see if they care if I just tell everyone to show up there. They didn't. I announce it.
So... June 11th came and there were maybe 20-30 people out for our "bar hop." I was practicing my lines from "Romy & Michelle's High School Reunion"-- "wow three kids, you must feel really tied down" (kidding! Kidding all my friends with kids... but on a serious note, no really) BUT I was nice and didn't use them ;) I guess the highlight of the first night was that one of the cute, popular but cool guys from h.s. (Jaxon Love), who I always thought was a little dreamy, but a little too popular to go for me, was definitely trying to talk to me all night. He's in grad school in Eugene, had been in the Peace Corps, but was going to San Fran for a summer internship, but asked for my #. Too bad he's not as hot as he was at 18 :( I don't think I could really go for him. He actually was a bit quiet and hard to talk to. Plus I just wasn't very attracted. Oh, also cool was it was just a lot of the xc team and people I'd had honors classes with who attended, so mostly was my crews from high school anyhow.
My "co-planner," at least she came all the way from LA
(actually we had a lot of fun together, she's a fun gal)
(actually we had a lot of fun together, she's a fun gal)
Yes, one of those gals below I did hold a grudge against forever,
because she was such a snobby bitch to everyone and had said some rude, snobby things to me... in like 6th grade.
Okay, I'm ready to be over all that old shit. Let's just move on.
because she was such a snobby bitch to everyone and had said some rude, snobby things to me... in like 6th grade.
Okay, I'm ready to be over all that old shit. Let's just move on.
Saturday night was okay too. Some of the same people from the first night came and then a few different faces, more of the xc team. There were maybe 30-40 of us at 10 Barrel. It worked out well enough. I felt bad for one of the guys, Chris Logan, who I gave a little attitude toward. He'd sent a message days before indicating that he'd be there. So when got to 10 Barrel at 6pm, there were like 4 people there and the restaurant was packed with other customers. So we put in for a table for like 15-20, a big bench-style table. And eventually it was filled and another 6-top was filled and some more people from h.s. would show up (this had to have been an hour or so later). And eventually Chris asks me "so where do we sit?" I dunno, it's a restaurant that we didn't reserve because no one would pay or even do very well as RSVP'ing so I had no way to really know how many people would show. So I said something like "well, there's a few seats at this table. Or there might be some over there. I don't know." Because I figured, hey I got people there. They don't want to pay for anything special, fine, my job is done at just announcing the location. He asked "should I put my name in for a table?" Sure, that's a great idea. "Well, for how many people?" And I said I really have no idea. There's maybe 5 of standing right now so that should be fine because I have no idea how many more will come. Luckily he's a pretty strong guy with a good sense of humor so he just laughed about it and got a table.
The strangest part for me was that none of my close friends were there (none could make it for various reasons), so whatever ideas about how I thought my ten year reunion would be didn't end up being anything like the actual experience. Which is fine. I've tried to be less invested in my expectations about how things will be because things always end up differently than I think, and sometimes for the better. It actually seemed like people from pretty similar cliques were there but everyone did well mingling. Since I coordinated it, I struggled with resisting the feeling that I needed to act like a hostess. I didn't want to feel responsible for everyone else's experience. I felt like I'd done my part. But I think I ended up talking to everyone there at some point.
It's an interesting social experiment for me to analyze about myself later too. I used to consider myself pretty shy (but how much have I actually outgrown that?) yet I am social and I do like going out with friends and meeting new people. I just contrast myself to friends I've had who love meeting new people and going to parties where they hardly or don't know anyone and they seem to really take to that. I don't enjoy that most of the time. For example, showing up to my reunion that will be full of people I haven't really talked to in 10yrs, not my top choice for an evening. Sure, I can talk to anyone and maybe I come off as being really sociable. And I care about people and what they have to say and am genuinely interested. It just takes some effort internally for me and afterward I'm a bit drained. Last night I had to just walk along the river by myself and go to bed early, like I felt over-stimulated if that makes sense. Plus we were out pretty late each night. :-)
Actually had a different reunion as well this weekend, which was the best part. Out Saturday night with my high school folks and into the bar walks some very good college friends that I hadn't seen in 6-7yrs. I met most of my friends at OSU one fateful night right before fall classes started my frosh year, haha, and these guys and I had some very fun times together during my undergrad. But during my grad program, even though I was at OSU, I started going my own way for a few reasons and we'd lost touch. So I ditched my old classmates and my friends took me rock climbing at Smith yesterday, which I hadn't done in a few years. Anyhow that was awesome to also see how much they are still these fun-loving, active guys but also very sweet, considerate of each other, and more open than I remember. I kept thinking, geez when did you guys grow up and have such adult experiences? Not as much the hard-partiers I remember. Nice to see how some things change, and others don't.
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